TWO.

[failhound]

• VIDEO •

[click. the camera's view is mostly blocked by what astute observers may eventually recognize as a palm -- there are glimpses of darkness and green otherwise, along with some loud crackling and rustling and interspersed curses]

Sure, so maybe it wasn't Her Ugliness' fault after all. This time. [there's a bit of dark muttering before he raises his voice again, though it sounds rushed and stiff] Nobody's seen some human brat with black-and-yellow hair and the worst attitude next to the human-eaters, right? Right. Good.

[there's radio silence for a bit before the obstruction moves out of the image, revealing... a disaster area: a field of flattened trunks, shattered to splinters by a giant invisible (flaming) hand, covered by some pathetic remnants of foliage... looks like forest, ground zero]

[but the pride of the scene is what looks like the half-incinerated carcass of either a Mad Cow or a Chocobo Eater -- hard to tell with how mangled it is -- currently being prodded at with one of the business ends of a long spear] Hey, I can eat this, right? Looks pretty well cooked and served already, there's loads. [he sounds very hopeful about this, and you would be too if you'd been living off bread and milk for weeks even before the post-apocalyptic wasteland]

[as he tears a chunk out, obviously not bothering to wait for opinions--] Oh. Hey, you! Lying sissy guy! You still owe me!

Comments

[moarcowbell.livejournal.com]

Ah... what do I owe you? I don't have any money on me right now.

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

Don't act senile! You owe me a fight!

[video]

[moarcowbell.livejournal.com]

It is normal for an old man to act as such.... do I?

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH.

And yes, you do!

[video]

[moarcowbell.livejournal.com]

I don't recall that...

[u-n-asplode.livejournal.com]

Human-eaters?

[brb ignoring everything else.]

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

The ones that eat humans.

[a beat]

The demons, I mean!

[video]

[u-n-asplode.livejournal.com]

...you mean youkai?

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

Uh... [maybe probably] Whatever you wanna call it! They're a pain in the ass either way!

action

[notyourson.livejournal.com]

[Yeah, so guess who's coming to check out the area.]

Woah, someone really did a number here.

[He notices Nora just as he says that, though.

[action!]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

[WHOA WHO IS THAT he wasn't actually expecting anything to still be moving, and with all the monsters he's seen coming in he... probably should have been more on the lookout.

As it is, he's just a little jumpy.]

W-Wha-- WHO'S THERE?!

[As he swivels around, the piece of charred Chocobo Eater/Mad Cow/mystery meat he'd been digging out with the tip of his spear goes flying.]

[action!]

[notyourson.livejournal.com]

[Ker-pwned, and he's falling off the tree he was standing on.]

Augh!

[action!]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

[Of all places to find what startled him, it wouldn't have occurred to him to look in the treeline first of all, but apparently luck is with him today.

Sort of.

In any case have a vaguely menacing-looking guy with a big spear standing over you.]

... Hey. What do you want?

[talktotheaegis.livejournal.com]

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

[o hay there]

[he peers curiously back at the dog, it looks like one of the normal ones]

People still drag their pets into this dump, huh? Jeez. Hope you're being fed, at least.

[video]

[talktotheaegis.livejournal.com]

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

Well, you look pretty healthy and all. Looks like your master actually appreciates you like he should, at least.

[icyconformist.livejournal.com]

It would be safer to cook it a bit more, but....

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

I would if I had my magic! It doesn't even matter, most of it's pretty much black.

[video]

[icyconformist.livejournal.com]

They say you can cook food too fast so it looks done, but it's really not. You might get sick.

[ Not that Yuki knows how to cook. But he heard it before! ]

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

I don't get sick! I've never caught a cold or anything, and I'm never gonna!

[you know that saying about how morons never get sick?]

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

[have a snort, he's not impressed, shorty] How 'bout overcooked, then?

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

[WHERE HAS ALL THE IMPRESSION GONE]

It's meat and it's dead and it's cooked, how's it not safe? I'm not dead yet. [makes a show of looking down at himself]