ONE.

[failhound]

• AUDIO •

[--THUD]

[... after what sounds like the crashlanding of the century, there are a few loud bumps agains the mic; what sounds uncannily like a confused chicken; and finally everything unmuffles as whatever was on the communicator moves off]

O-Ow! What the hell was I-- Hey, what is this? This isn't the cellphone! Where's my freakin'--

[rattle rattle rattle smack]

[BANG BANG BANG BANG]

COUGH IT UP, YOU PIECE OF JUNK! I ACTUALLY NEED THAT THING SOMETIMES!

[...]

All right. Have it your way.

[an intake of breath]

HEY, UGLY! YOU DISGUSTING, HORRIBLE, NO-GOOD, BANANAS-FOR-BRAINS OLD HAG!!

[pant pant]

I BET THIS IS YOU AGAIN, ISN'T IT?! THE HELL DID YOU DO THIS TIME?!? I DON'T EVEN-- [a pause] ... THIS ISN'T THE DEMON WORLD!

[another pause] So... it's the human world, right? With their dumb sun and everything. But I was just there -- hey, ugly, you better explain! I don't know that many places in the human world, you know!

[...]

... Ugly? [BANG] Hey, is this thing even working? HEY--

[click!]

• VIDEO •

[have an extreme closeup of one red eye peering suspiciously in general direction of the camera]

[a long moment later, the image tilts wildly as he lets it fall carelessly to the ground]

Useless thing! What am I supposed to--

[/transmission cut]

Comments

[brotundbier.livejournal.com]

Yelling isn't going to get you answers any faster!

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

Yeah? Well it's not gonna get me answers any slower, either!

[see, he can use logic]

Re: [video]

[brotundbier.livejournal.com]

Wrong! If you shout like that, whenever people tried to help you, you only ended up drowning out all their advice with senseless yelling. Not only that, I'm sure I'm not the only one who pointed out how obnoxiously loud you were, and as such, scolding you for improper behavior effectively delayed the time it took for you the get any of your accusations, questions, or statements answer.

So, yes, yelling made your answer come slower. ((shut down.))

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

I can't help it if you're all way too uptight, can I?! [Germany's logic, meet brick wall; brick wall, meet Germany's logic]

You going to waste everybody's time lecturing or say something useful for a change?

Re: [video]

[brotundbier.livejournal.com]

((It had to look like a nuclear explosion...))

Can you be calm for three and a half minutes and ask some reasonable questions? I'm assuming Ms. Knowledge has already contacted you, but I can answer a few questions beyond her guide.

[video]

[failhound.livejournal.com]

[it's a supernova!]

Hmph. Something about getting trapped in this whole Fortuna world and having all my powers locked up in a computer thing.

What kind of world is this, anyway?