TWO.

[failhound]

• VIDEO •

[click. the camera's view is mostly blocked by what astute observers may eventually recognize as a palm -- there are glimpses of darkness and green otherwise, along with some loud crackling and rustling and interspersed curses]

Sure, so maybe it wasn't Her Ugliness' fault after all. This time. [there's a bit of dark muttering before he raises his voice again, though it sounds rushed and stiff] Nobody's seen some human brat with black-and-yellow hair and the worst attitude next to the human-eaters, right? Right. Good.

[there's radio silence for a bit before the obstruction moves out of the image, revealing... a disaster area: a field of flattened trunks, shattered to splinters by a giant invisible (flaming) hand, covered by some pathetic remnants of foliage... looks like forest, ground zero]

[but the pride of the scene is what looks like the half-incinerated carcass of either a Mad Cow or a Chocobo Eater -- hard to tell with how mangled it is -- currently being prodded at with one of the business ends of a long spear] Hey, I can eat this, right? Looks pretty well cooked and served already, there's loads. [he sounds very hopeful about this, and you would be too if you'd been living off bread and milk for weeks even before the post-apocalyptic wasteland]

[as he tears a chunk out, obviously not bothering to wait for opinions--] Oh. Hey, you! Lying sissy guy! You still owe me!